I shamelessly stole that from Steven Furtick. Mainly because homies a genius, his knowledge is sound, and it’s right out of the bible.

Today was one of my most discouraging yet. Currently I am living a split life. At my church, I am a youth pastor with my fiance’ and we work hard building church. I drive an hour to get there multiple times a week and usually work all day Wednesday and then all day Sunday through both of our weekend services, and I really do love it. I am proud of what I do there, and grateful for my church family.

But then I drive back to where I currently live where I am employed in a temp position two days a week for a international shoe production company, as a studio photographer. I only get to see my fiance (who lives an hour away, near the church) for about three hours a night, maybe three times a week, we do have Saturday usually, which is a Godsend. It has been…very hard for us.

It’s absolute murder to have my life divided right down the middle, to be so far away from my fiance, and waiting for the right apartment to pop up so we can get married right away, looking for a fitting job, trying not to get burnt out…

The hardest days are the ones where I feel led into despair. I thank God for my family, my friends and my most encouraging fiance. I’ve tried to do so much on my own steam for so long, I just can’t do it anymore. But I have to believe that I am the closest to my calling, as the desire to give up, is terribly strong. I have to believe that through all this, He is working all things to the good of those who love the lord.

Relying on my Sovereign Lord to lift my head and give me good news in the week to come.

Don’t count on your warhorse to give you victory- for all its strength, it cannot save you. ~Psalm 33 : 17


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