I was out with my mother just a few days ago, and from a distance saw someone I had gone to school with. She was very clearly married, and was pregnant with her 6th child.
Now, I’m not old. I’m 27. But I’m not married either, and my life has taken some drastic turns lately that have left me gasping from breath and hobbling through some unfamiliar terrain. I saw her, and instantly felt sadness in my heart.
She has so many of the things I want right now. Husband, babies, family, home… and the list goes on. Instantly my mind went there, and so did my heart. Without contemplating her troubles, her personal issues aside, I was looking at her in a way of: you have that, and I don’t.
I think that God has been stressing to me in my life lately that my journey is my own. I need to make my own choices, know and trust my own leadings and understandings, and not compare anyone else’s walk to my own.
Hard times happen. But I will be stronger for it. It will make me hardy, so I can weather every storm. I myself will become a stable force, others can rely on. One day when I do have children I will be wise and strong and motherly.
But that’s not for today.
I wait in expectation and joy of where I am now, comparing myself to no one. It is a hard lesson to learn. But it is the truth. Through and through.
It is from suffering that the strongest souls ever known have emerged; the world’s greatest display of character is seen in those who exhibit the scars of sorrow; the martyrs of the ages have worn their coronation robes that have glistened with fire, yet through their tears and sorrow have seen the gates of heaven. ~Chapin